Hey, you know what you should do? If there's a small, independently-owned theater in your neighborhood, you should go there, buy a ticket, buy some food (because that's how theaters make profits) and enjoy the feeling you get from supporting what is (and should be?) a dying industry, no matter what movie it is you go to see. By the way, I saw 300: Rise of an Empire yesterday.
know, I appreciate a movie that gives me something to talk about, even
if it's bad. And, I can see that the makers of this film made a few
choices that showed they cared, if only a little bit. For the first half
of the movie, there is a CG storm covering the sky, which fills the
screen with nothing but dark blue colors offset by the lighter blue of
the Athenian cape. That's not an accident, you know, that's care, and it
creates an emotional and visual effect.
Granted, a similar technique was utilized in 300...
...but compared to other action movies, this type technique is still a very welcome addition to the movie.
have similar thoughts regarding actors as I do towards art in comic
books. On one end of the bell curve, there are actors and artists who
are so good they elevate the material, and on the other end, something
so bad that it distracts from the material. However, for me, most art
and most actors fall into a wide middle region. That adequate but not special region. I love Lena Headey, and the guys in the male leads in this movie do a great job, but Eva Green nails this role.
doesn't hurt that she also happens to be the most well-written
character in this movie by far. Our male protagonist claims to love
freedom and unified Greece, but I have no idea why. He doesn't seem to
have any motivation for loving these things and doesn't show that he
loves them in any way. Eva Green's character, on the other, gets an
extended origin story. We see the seeds of her revenge get planted and
grow, and watch her take steps to accomplish her goal. Everybody else
was just kinda hanging out. I wanted her to win.
this is all faint praise, because, as I said, this is a bad movie. I was
trying to figure out if the movie was being excessively bloody as a
stylistic choice or just to revel in violence, but eventually I settled
on the fact that it doesn't matter. It was still too fucking bloody. The
blood effects are of course, not real and not even realistic CGI, and
there so much of it to distract me every time somebody got killed, so I
was offended twice.
I can get lost in a dumb action. I can. For all its faults, 300
had a distinct style to it and it was damn fun to watch. This movie was
not fun, because every time a fight scene happened, I could only focus
on the huge amounts of fake, plastic-looking blood being poured out of
every wound. Every. Wound. I think somebody gets punched in the face at
one point and a gush of blood squirts out. Again, I get that this is an
action movie in love with excess, but it becomes a problem when it
distracts your audience.
I have a problem with
watching on-screen rape, especially in a movie where war and violence
are glorified. It equates the two in a bad way. If you want to show rape
in a movie that deals with it in a sober manner, alright. Uncomfortable
still, but acceptable. Eva Green's character has "rape as a backstory",
which is bad enough, but the fact that doesn't end up the victor at the
end sends an awful message.
And the sex scene. Let's talk about the sex scene. There was a sex scene in 300.
It was in the dark, with extreme close-ups, in slow motion, and
represented the love that Leonidas had for his wife that he couldn't
express verbally. The sex scene here goes on for way too fucking long,
in too much light and far too violently. What really sucks is that it
starts out serving a thematic and plot-related purpose, but, reveling in
excess, just goes on too long and shows too much. You are not showing
the characters' struggling with their attraction for each other, you are
watching porn. You are watching people fucking.
1) Well made? - Those blood effects are awful, and there are very few new stylistic elements to this movie that didn't also appear in 300
2) Contributed? - Not to anything. Maybe Eva Green's career.
3) Good time? - Nooo. It was boring at best.
4) Watch again? - Never.
5) Worth it? - Not even. There is nothing to be gained here.
6) Who should watch this? -